impinged

Many people put up trees, lights, and decorations this time of year. I put up a wall. That way everyone will see how great things are in my life and how together I am. No one will know what is really going on inside me. And for a few minutes, neither will I because I’ve buried it all so deep. For 10 years I’ve built this wall. It has been a formidable wall fortified with many substances. I’m afraid though. I’m afraid it isn’t as strong as it has been in the past. I saw last week there were some cracks.

As I was trying to fall asleep at 6am this morning, after being out all night with a youth group function, I started thinking of something I read the night before. I read about having a servant’s heart. That means doing for others because it is the right thing to do, not for what we get out of it. That’s a pretty simplified definition but it works. As I thought about that my mind took it a step further and I asked myself the question, “Who would I give my life for?” Obviously my answer included family members and some close friends. Those are easy because the love in the relationship is reciprocated. But then my list grew to include a half a dozen people that I really care about and would sacrifice anything for even though I know the feeling isn’t mutual. In fact, most of the people on this list have openly rejected me for reasons of their own.

Then I heard a voice in my head ask, “Why would you be willing to lay down your life for someone who wouldn’t do it for you? For someone who may not even thank you for your sacrifice?” The question startled me but I had to answer, “because I’m not doing it for me, I’m doing it for them.” Then the voice answered, “Now you understand Christ’s love.”

Revelation 21:18 - The material of the wall was jasper…
Revelation 21:19 - … the first foundation stone was jasper…

In describing the new heaven, the apostle John tells of how the walls, foundation, and streets are made of precious stones and metals. One of these stones is jasper. Jasper is a beautiful stone but also a pretty common one. I was given a piece of jasper a week ago as a reminder of heaven and the promises we have as Christians. I decided to put it in my pocket and carry it every day with me. Whenever I put my hand in my pocket and feel the stone I’m reminded of heaven. I’m also reminded of something else…

When our Lord Jesus Christ taught us how to pray he said we ought to pray, “Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.” God’s will is always done in heaven. To me that means that when his will is done on earth, we have a little piece of heaven here on earth. With so much aridity filling this life it is nice to think we can have a little piece of heaven while we’re here. So that little piece of jasper in my pocket reminds me of heaven, and then it reminds me to pray that His will be done, and then I feel a little better knowing He is in control and I’ve got my little piece of heaven in my pocket, here on earth.

I’ve spent some time recently reading the stories of some famous biblical figures. Two in particular: Ruth and Joseph. Both had terrible things happen in their life. Joseph was sold by his brother’s into slavery and then betrayed by Potipher’s wife and thrown into prison for years. Ruth’s husband died leaving her in a land without her family and any way to support herself. Neither one of these situations were resolved quickly. Both Joseph and Ruth went through seasons of great distress. But they both had something in common: in spite of their circumstances they pressed on, doing what was right, and honoring God. After these seasons of suffering had sufficiently developed their character, God stepped in and changed everything. In an instant they were blessed and their lives were restored.

From this I think I’ve learned a valuable lesson as to how God works. He brings us through seasons of pain and suffering in order to salt our character. This season may seem to go on entirely too long for our liking, but on the other side there is great blessing. And that blessing comes in an instant. In an instant our lives can turn to a living hell, and it can stay that way for some time, but in an instant God reaches down and lifts us out… at the right instant.

I was working out last night and this song called Shine from the Newsboys started playing on my MP3 player. Now this wasn’t a surprise since I had loaded it on my MP3 player but for some reason the words really stood out to me last night. When the song finished I played it again and as I listened I just felt invigorated. As I listened to the chorus I was thinking that this is what I want for my life’s motto.

Again this morning I listened to the song twice in a row and again was invigorated. I just want people to look at me and wonder what I’ve got that they don’t, and I want that answer to be Jesus Christ. Here is the chorus I’m speaking of:

SHINE
MAKE ‘EM WONDER WHAT YOU’VE GOT
MAKE ‘EM WISH THAT THEY WERE NOT
ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING BORED
SHINE
LET IT SHINE BEFORE ALL MEN
LET ‘EM SEE GOOD WORKS, AND THEN
LET ‘EM GLORIFY THE LORD